Our mother, Annie Reid Mattox Bessire, was born 1924 in the country about 30 miles from Nashville, Tennessee. She was the 2nd of 5 siblings. She shared childhood memories with us of a close-knit community that came together in the summer to play fiddle, dance and sing. In the winter, evenings were spent around the fire listening to old-time radio.
Due to growing up in the depression era, she learned to be thrifty, resourceful and creative, using what was available. Those skills followed her throughout her entire life. In spite of struggling financially, looking her best was always important and she managed to dress well and look nice. She attended the first three years of high school, then due to family finances, shifted to working full time while completing high school at night. During WW ll years, she attended dances at Fort Knox and other USO clubs, meeting and dating a number of soldiers.
Mom met Dad, the love of her life, John, at a Christian college in Tennessee. They were married for 61 years until his passing in 2010. As a blind man, John acquired the skills and education to be a successful preacher with the Church of Christ, a school principal, a high school math teacher and Braille teacher to blind adults.
Ann was a crucial element in his success! As a supportive wife, she ran the household, managed the family finances, read to John while assisting him with sermon preparation and lesson plans. The church community was always dominant in their lives. She was a strong focused mother and did not let us get away with anything. Justice was swift and many times we got whacked with whatever was at hand. They were parents united and together they installed in us unfailing responsibility and a deep sense of justice.
She did all the driving which included not only the day to day errands and appointments but also cross state/cross country moves pulling a trailer. The family lives in Missouri, Arkansas and for many years in California where all three of us (Phil, Becky, Teresa) were born.
Mom had a spunky, adventuresome side that few people saw. There were times, as kids, when she would load us up in the car to follow fire trucks and ambulances to find out what was going on. A couple of times, on similar adventures, she drove up into the San Gabriel Mountains behind fire lines to explore. Later, when we lived in the San Francisco Bay Area, she would hop in the car and take us on day trips to the city and elsewhere.
Our parents were strong believers in taking whatever lemons life handed you and turning it into the best lemonade possible. They instilled that in us and demonstrated it most poignantly when Teresa, the youngest, began losing her sight at the age of seven. This was a very difficult time for the whole family. It was extra difficult for mother, who had to deal with all the doctor appointments and care for Teresa. There were four eye surgeries in a nine month period! John was supportive, both emotionally and in helping sort out priorities. He was there for all surgery days. Mom had a mission to take Teresa to see as many sights as she could before all her vision was gone. She remembers a time at the San Francisco Zoo standing in front of an exhibit, mom’s hand on a rail, body stiff with a look on her face a seven year old couldn’t interpret. Teresa later realized she was trying not to cry in public. It seems so sad she had to bear so much of this by herself.
There were church friends and family that helped out bringing food to the house and sitting with Teresa at the hospital. Teresa was not an easy child to take care of. She rebelled against being told she must be perfectly still, not moving or jumping around. Our mom had not only a blind husband, two energetic teenagers to deal with and now the addition of a blind daughter.
Remember we told you about lemons to lemonade? There were blessings in all this. Dad worked at a residential center that taught daily living skills to adult blind. Dad asked his colleagues what technique to use when Teresa needed to learn a new skill. Mom taught her to function in the kitchen, do laundry, vacuum and other household chores. She taught Teresa to write checks and keep a check book in Braille….plus lots more. They expected all of us to keep our grades up no matter what.
Mom was just mom, so we didn’t fully appreciate just how strong and wise she was until much later. Our parents were not perfect, what human being is, but they were a team and truly pillars of strength going quietly about the business of living a good life and instilling strong values in their children.
Portland, Oregon became home in 1994 where their church involvement continued. Ann enjoyed her church community, cooking southern style for family and friends. She discovered later in life a talent and love of oil painting.
She suffered from dementia the last 10 years of her life and yet continued doing things she loved for as long as she was able. When she was no longer able to do her painting and cooking, she loved spending hours looking at photos of immediate and extended family members.
She is survived by her three children, Phil Bessire, Becky Bessire-Wold and Teresa Christian. She has eight grandchildren and eleven great grandchildren. She was preceded in death by her husband and all four of her siblings.
We will miss you mom!
Graveside services to be held in the spring in California.